Archive | Advice RSS feed for this section

How to Find a Mentor, or Two

“We All Need a Few Good Mentors” read a headline in today’s opinion pages of the Wall Street Journal. It’s a sentiment I share, based on my own experience of having been poured into by older, wiser women, professors, and married couples over the past 27 years. In the article, Fay Vincent, formerly CEO of Columbia […]

Continue Reading

How can I break up with an unbelieving boyfriend without turning him off to the faith?

Last week I received an email from a woman wondering about the best way to break up with her unbelieving boyfriend. She wrote, I have decided to break up with my non-Christian boyfriend. Should I tell him that my main reason for doing so is his lack of faith and thereby risk turning him off to […]

Continue Reading

I Married an Unbeliever, Now What?

Last week advice columnist Starshine Roshell answered a question at from a self-described Christian woman married to an atheist man. She wrote, I have been married for two years, and we just got pregnant. Neither of us was planning it and we were using birth control, but I guess we were the lucky 1 percent. […]

Continue Reading

What if Your Friends are a Bad Influence?

In my recent advice column at I answer the question “How can I end a friendship that pulls me away from Christ?” The author of the question writes, When I began graduate school a few years ago, I formed a close friendship with a non-Christian classmate. Although I’ve tried to plant seeds in her […]

Continue Reading

Keeping Wedding Costs Down

When we got married, $10,000 seemed like a fortune to spend on a wedding. Now that amount would barely cover half the cost of the average American wedding. Is it possible to have a celebration fitting the grand occasion of your wedding while still honoring God as His steward? This week I have a column […]

Continue Reading

Loving your wife when you hate the “romantic industrial complex”

Men, as we enter the week of Valentine’s Day, is there a part of you that feels a little anxious as sellers of romantic gifts and services peddle their wares and set expectations for how men should go about translating love for their wives? Are you tempted to just write it off as a Hallmark […]

Continue Reading

A Military Path to Marriage

This week, Boundless editor Ted Slater had a creative idea. Rather than the typical Q&A with John Thomas (for the guys), he thought it would be creative to have John and I both weigh in on the same question. I had an immediate and strong reaction to the question when I first read it, and […]

Continue Reading Comments { 1 }

Recent Roundup

Tuesday Candice joined radio host Debbie Chavez to talk about being single, hoping for marriage, living like you’re planning to marry, and more in an interview about Get Married. The interview was live but she’s posted a link to the archive here. Also Tuesday, Boundless ran Candice’s article How to Pray for a Husband. If […]

Continue Reading Comments { 0 }

How Important is Chemistry in Dating?

“I’ve been dating this guy (pre-med, kind of nerdy, logical, strategic type of guy) for two years. He is smart, consistent, predictable, and incredibly faithful. He wants to honor me, provide for me, and marry me. He has been very intentional with my parents and with his desire to love and cherish only me. I […]

Continue Reading Comments { 0 }

A Weighty Issue

Last week’s Q&A on Boundless was a challenge to answer. The man writing the question had dated his wonderful, beautiful, godly girlfriend for a year. The only trouble is that he couldn’t get past the fact that she was overweight. He wondered if I’d write more candidly about how my appearance affected my relationship with […]

Continue Reading Comments { 5 }