The Pros and Cons of Friendship

Friendship is a good starting point for a great marriage. Friendship can be the very thing that keeps you from marriage.

Surprisingly, both of those statements are true. Or can be. The challenge with male friends is knowing which sort of friendship you’re in.

Recently I answered a question from a woman who was frustrated that her male friendships hadn’t led to something more and that her emotions were keeping her from be happy with “just friends” when she really wanted more.

Friendship is great. It can be a strong foundation for a romantic relationship. I even talk in Get Married about how women often overlook men in the “just friends” category as potential husbands. But if a friendship has stopped progressing from “just friends” to something more—especially if that male friend has come right out and said he does not want anything more (read: romantic)—then at that point, the friendship can go from promising to poisoning.

What does it poison? Opportunities for marriage to someone else.

How can you know if your friendship is full of potential or potentially poisoning? For starters, check out this handy DTR (define the relationship) assessment from Boundless. It’s free and takes just a few minutes. You can also read the rest of my answer to the friends question in “The Poison in Just Friends.

What’s your experience with guy friendships? Do you have a promising outcome? We’d love to hear about it!